Building Abusers

I must admit to a certain bit of reluctance to continually come back to this blog because each time I do, there I am, re-living a little piece of the trauma. But I’m compelled to because;

#1. After about 54 years I still have to get it OUT!

#2. Maybe someone needs to hear it besides me

So I let it sit without comment for weeks at a time, and during that time, of course, because this Blog is part of my life story now, ideas percolate. Also, I become inspired by other contributors — especially the ones, like Robert who wasn’t quite sure if the Blog was  still operational. Even I forget sometimes that fire needs continual attention!

A theme that has kept coming up for me as I search for better understanding of the topic of abuse at the hands of nuns is that sexual repression makes you act weird.

What became the icing on the cake were some on-line article speaking of the development of an iPhone application to help Catholics prepare for confession (these are quotes from a couple of sources with links):

The app’s designers and some believers see it as a way to spur Catholics back into the habit of repenting…”There’s a reason we designed it for these mobile devices: We want you to go to confession,” said Patrick Leinen, one of the developers and a co-founder of the company Little iApps.

The text-based app takes the user through the Ten Commandments, with a slew of questions attached to each, a process known as an examination of conscience, which penitents undergo before confession.

Questions range from “Have I wished evil upon another person?” to “Have I used any method of contraception or artificial birth control in my marriage?” and users can check a box next to each sin they’ve committed.


The firm said the content of the app was developed with the help of Reverend Thomas Weinandy of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, and Reverend Dan Scheidt, pastor of Queen of Peace Catholic Church in Mishawaka, Indiana.


Maureen Dowd at the NYTimes notes that the hot new app

Walks you through the Ten Commandments, your examination of conscience and any “custom sins” you might have…

For instance, if you sign in as a 15-year-old girl and look under the Sixth Commandment, one of the questions is: “Do I not treat my body or other people’s bodies with purity and respect?” If you sign in as a 33-year-old married man, that commandment offers this query: “Have I been guilty of masturbation?”Under the Sixth Commandment, men and women are asked: “Have I been guilty of any homosexual activity?” Priests, however, are not. They are asked if they flirt.

Something evil has been done and you better note it and be clear on it. This, they say, will help you repent you evil creature you!

But when you scan through the list, a kind of “decision-tree” custom-designed to make you face your personal collection of miserable, (literally!) hell-bent sins, so much of it is about judging the experience of normal sexual desires.

Sure, the idea is keep a handle on ACTING OUT your baser instincts, but according to the app tracking your evil means  judging yourself first about things that will throw you into Eternal Damnation:  homosexuality, masturbation, fantasizing, making remarks and even having all the thoughts associated with sexual expression.

Let’s mention this one more time for the hell of it: the consequence of transgression is ETERNAL DAMNATION!

The Church was fine about the app at first. Here in the U.S. (referenced above) a number of Catholic Bishops supported it as a tool to help facilitate preparation for Confession, but then, when there was an implication that you could also receive a form of absolution WITHOUT being physically in front of a Priest, well, then, the Church had a fit!

After all, once you step inside the Church, and go to the Confessional, it is customary to make a donation “to the poor.” But they have to make sure you step inside!

Priests catch the flak these days, DECADES after their despicable actions. Nuns, as yet have basically gotten off Scott-free, yet that all is diversionary. How could it be otherwise because not one iota of focus is being placed on   the stuff that drives Priests and Nuns to taking their crap out on the Innocent.

What the app claims to help you regulate, my Friends, is the very STUFF that makes Priests and Nuns take their frustrations out on kids!

It’s all about STOPPING the natural flow of energy. Sexual energy is a (literally!) potent force. The energy has to go somewhere, but let me ask you this:

How come Buddhist Monks aren’t out there messing with little children but Priests and Nuns are? They both focus on sexual energy don’t they?

Perhaps there is a significant difference between holding back sexual expression because it will merit you Eternal Damnation and holding it back because it is a distraction from what is real.

Real is somewhere you want to be, Eternal Damnation is somewhere that you want to avoid at all costs, but because being human with human desires automatically qualifies you for failure, you’re gonna lose anyway so what the hell! As a human being you are in the midst of a very twisted conflict.

Whereas other religious orientations channel the energy, Catholicism CORKS it. Just like with a volcano, when something shifts underneath the surface and the lava starts flowing into the chambers again, pressure builds up and up and then…BOOM!

If Priests are the tip of the iceberg and Nuns are below the surface, what do you do with all the parents who brought children into the world due to an obligation to procreate manufactured by the Church and then go on to perpetuate abuse?

The Church is actively putting Innocents into harms way by MANDATING that everyone conceived gets born; regardless of the circumstances they are born in to. Now we’re going into a tailspin because that’s talking of abortion, how can I weasel out of this one?

My point is the orientation of the Church continues to make it likely, if not probable that children get hurt.

If not through the declaration that their normal sexual feelings will doom them to hell, then through placing their bodies into the care of individuals whose own sexual expression has been so controlled, they are likely to explode at any time.

Like I keep saying; the whole system is sick.


4 Responses to “Building Abusers”

  1. George Says:

    Glad that you come back to the blog because it seems to wind down when you are not available. You made two great points. One is that the church doesn’t like the confession app because they may lose those who feel absolved and don’t go to confession and put money in the collection box. It also takes away some of the church’s control. The other is that telling innocent children that their thoughts or actions may be “impure” and then going and doing the same and worse to them and in the name of God, created a generation of people who developed with opposing messages that make it difficult for them to heal mentally and spiritually. Continuing this blog and getting the facts out in every way we can goes a long way towards a cure for what ails us.

  2. rickcarufel Says:

    I just started a Facebook group called Catholic School Abuse.
    I will be using this group to gather research material for a Book on the subject.

  3. John Zelenak Says:

    I am still dealing with the anger I have against the nuns that abused us physicality and verbally! People that went to public school do not believe the stories I tell them and the bad memories of an institution that should have been loving and shown what Jesus is really like.

    How could nuns and priests hurt little kids and live with what they caused! If they could sleep at night after the pain they caused and think that they were doing Chris’ work , shame on them and they all will have to answer to their crimes!

    If what we experienced while in our formative years is silenced then it surely will be repeated again! I had such an anger and resentment to God for him to let adults who said religious phrases and led us kids to believe the abuse we received was justified that it took decades until I found the Truth and allowed God into my heart, totally changing my whole concept of a Loving God and allowing me to be me and not some religious phony .

    I had 2 sisters and a brother who went to catholic prison as well and we all made it out, kinda!

    My youngest brother and sister somehow didn’t have to attend the same school but we’re fortunate to go to public school across the street a couple blocks away. When the nuns saw the public school kids walking by the catholic school the nuns would say”Those children are going to hell because they are not like you”!

    Well if anyone is going to hell its the nuns that should have tossed in their black robes and known what they were doing was WRONG!

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